Tomfoolery, Shenanigans, Nonsense and general Ballyhoo

On the topic of things one shouldn't count on me for...

One should never make the faulty assumption that I will take on any kind of a "handiman" project and remain in good humor. Don't do it. Don't be near me while I work. It is in your best interests and the best interests of my project.

I don't play well with others when I am "working things out" in my head. Since I'm not a trained carpenter, plummer, or electrician, any project I work on at home requires me to "figure it out". I need to stand and stare. I need time to work out, in my head, how things go together, in what order they must go together, and in what means I can most effeciently make that happen.

Interupting me, standing near me, offering suggestions, calling people to ask them for suggestions, or doing anything else that distracts me from the task at hand is a bad idea. It is not in the best interests of the project, nor is it likely to be good for your physical, emotional, or mental well-being. So, leave it alone. Leave me alone. I assure you that when I reach the end of the project, all will be well.

I alight this topic now for one reason. I am attempting to replace the storm door on the front of my house. Not a project I've ever tried before...never hung any kind of a door. What little I do know of this project is that there is the tricky business of getting all the different bits to line up properly so that your door will...you know...work.

The door I recently acquired was a gift of sorts (don't ask). It was from the scratch-n-dent pile at Home Depot and did not include instructions, hardware, or all of the parts required to install it. So, in addition to the challenges of having to self-learn how one goes about properly installing a storm door. I also have the challenge learning how to install this particular door...knowing that I only have about 75% of the hardware actually required to do the job.

Thus, when my mother (again, don't ask) decided she'd "help me out"...things took a turn for the worse. The project came to a sudden and nearly violent hault.

So, again, let me say the following. As I work on a project...that perplexed look on my face is not, I repeat, IS NOT, in fact an invitation for help, suggestions, or advice. It is a warning. When you see a hammer/screwdriver/power tool in my hand and that perplexed look on my face you should immediately steer clear of territory that is within shouting distance of me. I'm offering this warning now on the off chance that any person reading this blog is ever set with the unfortunate opportunity to happen upon me while I am mid-project.

It's not that I'm mean spirited. But, I can honestly say...unless you are a trained plummer/carpenter/electrician and are offering to just do the project for me...you are of no help whatsoever. Leave me be. If I need you to hold something...I'll find you.